Sunday, December 05, 2004
went for standard chartered today early in the morn. i pulled myself out of bed cos i was still having "hangover" from ytd madness.. i believe those presence will noe wat i mean by sayin that.. but its due to some silly misunderstandin, miscommunication or shall i say is lack of communication. and blame it on my rashness which cos me to be rude and create a hell lot of probs.. but i jus wan to say that it takes 2 hand to clap.. when a argument breakes out, both party wil be at fault no matter who starts it.. at the point of moment, i feel like breaking down, die and everything wil be over but.. things aint tt easy to settle.
i really dun understand y always i am the 1.. acc to aud.. its cos of my stupid temper.. had so much talk with so many diff ppl ytd.. my mum thinks tt i am crazy.. dion thinks i am under some spell.. my sis think i rush into things.. n ppl there thinks i am rude.. but have they been thru this? or wat wil they do if they were me.. don jus talk.. but think b4 u talk.. n empty vessels make the most noise..
i am always puttin a brave front ppl.. ppl expectation of me.. i must behave this way tt way.. but does anyone ever stand by me... not even my closest kin.. i feel upset... i am human.. i wil feel tired.. do u noe wat i mean..? i am useless.. don expect too much frm me.. the higher the ecpectation the harder u wil fall..
i wan to do things i like.. do sth bold n shocking.. sth tt i think i nv wil do... i dunno wat i am talking abt now.. i need some advice.. i need some directions.. i need support again.. maybe tt y i breaks down ytd.. cos i keeo everything inside me too long..
live everyday like u nv b4.. and u wil nv regret.. <-- my motto of the week.. watever comes watever i wil take it on..
loving it;;